Colonel Cator's Grooming Regimen: Hardware Every Guy Must Own

A handful of essentials you can ask random relatives to lace you with. Happy holidays.

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Two short weeks ago we introduced you to our new grooming contributor, Colonel Cator Sparks, and proceeded to astound you with his unimpeachable expertise in all things barbershop related. We learned how to tip, what to ask for, and most importantly, how not to be regarded as a douchebag in the hallowed grounds of manly tonsorial awesomeness. With Thanksgiving on the horizon and gift giving season in full force, this week the Colonel guides us through the four must-have pieces of grooming hardware that you can ask your various relatives for instead of the stiff cankle suffocating socks they always give you. Super easy, super fast. Happy holidays.

OK, for our first installment we talked products. Which by now all of y'all have (right?) but here are the top four articles of equipment that also should be found somewhere in your bathroom. Let's go:

The Mason Pearson Rake Comb

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I know, I know, this sounds tired and basic but let's be honest most of you aren't doing it, and it's not just for the sake of appearances. Running a comb through your hair helps keep your scalp clean and of course is a pretty basic way to style your hair. Don't use plastic combs, hello static! For you curly haired dudes or dudes with thick hair use a wide-toothed comb to avoid tangles. We know it's pricy but this is a comb you will have for life. Cop a Mason Pearson comb. I've had mine for 15 years and each celluloid tooth is polished so you can use it with wet or dry hair. Find one at Bergdorf Goodman, $28

Nail Clippers

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Quit borrowing your mom's. Gross. Buy your own nail clippers for pocket change. People's nails grow at different rates but basically if they are long enough to get dirt under 'em its time to cut 'em. It's not a myth, girls and prospective employers are always impressed with clean nails. And long toenails rip through socks which is inconvenient and disgusting. Clip nails straight across and get the gunk out from under them with a nail brush. Revlon Nail Clippers, at any drug store, $2

LATHER Pumice Stone

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Granted some men (space alien men, mostly) are lucky to have smooth soles but many of us are cursed with hard, dry areas somewhere on our feet. To relieve this situation buy a pumice stone and use it in the shower once a week (they work best on wet skin). This is especially important for Southern dudes who wear flip flops nearly all year round. Lucky bastards. On Amazon, $6

Beard Clippers

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Facial hair is big these days but out-of-control scary hair bears aren't cool. Make it a weekly ritual to trim your beard, moustache or goatee once a week. The Wahl peanut is small, quiet and has four different clipper sizes so you can easily go Don Johnson 5 o'clock shadow or more bushy Brawny dude. On Amazon, $34

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